pack nothing.

pack nothing.
bring only your determination to serve
and your willingness to be free.

pack nothing.

i clearly failed in the physical meaning of that. i packed a lot, all things that i actually have used (except for a couple of emergency items, which i am glad to not have used). i was proud of my packing ability. keeping within the weight limit and not packing more than i could handle (albeit, slowly). but, upon further examination, maybe pack nothing doesn't have to do so much with the physical things i packed in my suitcase, but my expectations.

i did my best in preparing for slovakia to not have expectations. i tried not to get my hopes up, but to be realistic that 1-i didn't know what i'd be doing and 2-life (especially abroad) is not always positive. once i was at our orientation in bratislava, i did take a day to write down (after having met my host family briefly) some of my expectations. they were mainly general things: expecting to get along pretty well with my family, to experience love (not the romantic kind), to share, create, and learn stories; to have work connected to roma and not explicitly connected to roma, to feel lonely at some point, to learn, to find god and deepen my relationship with god, and, of course, to go through every emotion imaginable. so, while i packed some things, they were general and i was intentional about not packing a lot of expectations.

bring only your determination to serve

done. definitely got that one down. i brought that. why was i coming here if it was not to serve? i came to serve, not to be served. in being here, however, i have been served. i have come to know god more deeply through the service of others. by coming here to serve and to learn, i came here without assumptions of superiority. i did not come as "the american missionary," i came as emily, young adult in a global mission of service. it has taught me more than i ever could have learned if i had come here to teach. and it has brought me to a place of mutual service with those around me, those i work with. we all serve each other in a variety of ways. each different, but all meaningful.

and your willingness to be free

what could that mean? am i free? my willingness to be free to love? free from sin? free for service? i am willing and determined to be free to share in god's love with all of god's precious and beloved children. my freedom cannot happen alone. i cannot be free if others are not. perhaps that is the "free" of which we are speaking.

archbishop desmond tutu articulates (quite well) a concept called "ubuntu." he defines ubuntu as the understanding that "my humanity is caught up, is inextricably bound up, in yours." if we take this understanding of ubuntu and apply it to freedom. then my freedom is caught up, is inseparably connected and dependent upon your freedom. and so, my willingness to be free, requires that all are free. we cannot free others, but we can, together, work for our freedom as children of a god who loves greater and more fully than any of us could ever imagine. my willingness to be free must also be my willingness for the world to be free. free to love, free to serve, free to live.

pack nothing.
bring only your determination to serve
and your willingness to be free.